You Got Crabcakes

I went out to dinner with a ho bag (Susan) and some acquaintances on Saturday. We went to a restaurant called "Betty's" and had quite the delightful time. Were I to call it anything, I would call it like when you're fishing for trout and catch some other, better kind of fish instead. I knew I would have a nice time, but not this nice of a time. So, the scholarly young man in our group--we'll call him Franklin--decided crab cakes would be an appropriate appetizer, and sought accomplices in his crab cake endeavor. I helplessly agreed, figuring we could make the most excellent crab-cake devouring team since Johnson & Johnson.

Naturally, as we're waiting for this to pass, the others share story about previous crab cake indulgences. Susan and her companion had had crab cakes in Baltimore that were priced "at market price". They ended up being a $28 order of crab cakes. Shnikes. She said she thought that they were probably caught the same day they were eating. Naturally, I wondered out loud (where are my manners?) "Aren't crabs usually caught the day they were eaten?" If you don't get that, you're not old enough to read this blog, and it's probably past your bedtime.

Now, the hilarity ensues as I try to recall EXACTLY how that joke went. I mean, in my last post, you all saw the struggles I have with remembering the hilarity that comes from this generation's Mark Twain (me). So, I asked my dear friend Susan (the ho bag, who henceforth will be referred to as "Lisa") to borrow her phone. I had no pen and paper with me--who does on a Saturday night?--and needed to remember the delicate wording verbatim for this joke to be executed properly. The result is a voicemail on my phone, from myself, which is transcribed here:

"Uh, usually you do get crabs on the--wait(background noise)--crabs are usually caught on the day you ate them. That has to do with the disease crabs and sexual nature but also it's a play on words about like the actual food crabs. we had crab cakes and Lisa was talking about fresh crab and she said it was caught the day that she ate it and I said usually crabs are caught the day that you ate them. (pause) And it's funny. So, use that in your blog. Got it, dumbass? Bye."

Thus, you have this post.

Congrats to BT for winning, twice (so unnecessary) and Emily Turner for taking 2nd (3rd?). And congrats to the News for being a giant doucher.

I apologize for the language in this post. I promise it will improve in the future.

Tonight's question---with which baseball team did Orel Hershiser play in college?

Web searches will not be tolerated. Someone HAS to know this.