Sunday, May 31, 2009

Dear David Stern

Dear David Stern:
I have some serious bones to pick with you. First, you take my favorite college basketball player, Mark Titus and forbid him from entering the NBA Draft. Let me tell you something, Mr. Stern, you've sold us all on the fact that the NBA is a business. We get it. LBJ may or may not be a Knick in a year or so because this is a business. Whatever is good for the teams, and ultimately the league financially is what is to happen. So, I really do not understand this thing. Mark Titus is probably one of the top 20 well-known college basketball players in the country. You refuse to let him enter the league? All that's going to happen is that he'll make money himself, for the team, and ultimately for the league. Bogus.

Second, why did you let Orlando cheat against the Cavs? Crap, it's right their in their team name! The MAGIC! I knew this series was doomed from the get-go because the other team would be using illusions. I firmly believe right now, and further research is necessary to delve into this a bit more, that at least 70% of all the made three pointers the MAGIC shot were illusions. Their shot really wasn't going in, they relied on MAGIC to make sure that it did. I want our congresspeople in on this. I want Barack Obama in on it. Expose the NBA and the MAGIC for what they are--magicians, who are cheaters.

I discovered a sheet of paper with two funny thoughts I had a while back. Here they are:

One time, I shook my baby maker. The neighbor girl did not like it, and the charges are still pending.

Apparently 90% of all 15 year olds have cell phones. This is according to a survey done by Verizon Wireless using numbers of their subscribers.

Chuck Norris does not eat cereal. In fact, Wheaties are made of 100% pure Chuck Norris, hence why they are the breakfast of champions.

N-Stick, out.

OOOoooooo we need a game!

How high can you count?! No cheating! And.... go!

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